Stop the presses. Kylie Jenner just discovered that milk and cereal go well together, or so she says on Twitter. “Last night I had cereal with milk for the first time,” she tweeted on Tuesday night. “Life changing.” Indeed, cereal is, but is that actually true, King Kylie?
last night i had cereal with milk for the first time. life changing.
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
It’s difficult to believe that one of the youngest female entrepreneurs in the world has never actually eaten cereal with milk. Yes, she’s been busy building a beauty empire, but someone with that much privilege and exposure must have tried a bowl of wet cereal at least once in her 21 years on Earth. Which leads me to the conclusion that Kylie must now own stock in General Mills, or a dairy farm, because I really can’t believe this tomfoolery.
As Man Repeller notes, cereal used to be a household breakfast staple, but it’s slowly lost prominence to more healthful options a la acai bowls, avocado toasts and the like. As society continues to march to the beat of the “wellness” drum, breakfast cereal has edged towards obsoletion. The nostalgia and convenience factors of cereal are still enough for some to continue eating them, but the overwhelming majority no longer does, according to a number of reports.
— General Mills (@GeneralMills) September 18, 2018
While I refuse to believe this is the first time Kylie’s ever eaten breakfast cereal with milk, I do have to give her credit for finding the joy in something that has become so rote. Breakfast is no longer about getting excited to pick out all of the horseshoe-shaped marshmallows in your bowl. It’s a means to an end. Breakfast, for so many, is about achieving some idealized picture of glowing, radiating health.
And is all of this pining after health and wellness sucking the joy out of breakfast? I’d say so. Life is too short, give the green juice a break and eat the damn Captain Crunch for a change.